Always
by Arabella-Minette
Summary: A sequel to my oneshot 'Almost' Helga thinks she has pushed Arnold away by showing him her true self. She doesn't know that he has something he wants to get of his chest too!


A/N Hi Guys! Well it has been absolutely aaaaaages since I've updated anything - for which I'm very sorry. However I have been recently reinspired and sooooo Ta Da! Here is the first result of my recent inspiration. This is a sequel to my story Almost. You don't need to have read it before you read this but you might want to as its from Arnold's perspective and will give you more information and background. So...without further ado let's begin :D

Disclaimer: Uh *tugs at collar nervously and turns away blushing* ermm well if you must know, no I don't own Hey Arnold - Mr B. Does!

Always

Helga Pataki sighed as the bell rang and she gathered up her books, shoving them haphazardly into her bag. What was wrong with her? She had been out of sorts for a while and she was aware that others had noticed it too. Phoebe kept asking her if everything was alright, and all Helga could do was answer despondently "Same as ever Pheebs…"

The problem was that things weren't the same. But how could she make that better? Swinging her bag over her shoulder, she glanced discretely back at Arnold. He seemed to be studying a piece of paper, his brows furrowed in…concentration…confusion? She drank in the planes of his face, his green eyes which were narrowed at the moment, and his unruly golden hair which her fingers itched to run through. As always in her life, HE was the problem.

Things had changed between them and she knew it. She also thought she knew the reason: she had scared him away. This was a logical conclusion to come to really. After all things had changed since the night of the Spring Dance. She turned quickly away from boy behind her before he noticed her looking, and left the classroom, letting her feet lead her out of the school. Memories of that night a couple of months ago flashed before her eyes

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_She'd hoped that she would see him here tonight. That was the truth of it. It was one of the reasons she'd dressed up. She was wearing the midnight blue dress that Phoebe had picked out for her; it was slinky and a little more revealing than Helga was used to with a low back. Apparently the colour brought out the blue in her eyes. She wasn't too sure about that, but she had to admit that she liked it, and she knew that it showed of her curves delicately. It looked 'expensive' and Helga knew she looked pretty – not beautiful or gorgeous because she would never be one of those girls, no matter how hard she tried. But she had to admit that she scrubbed up well. Her hair was pinned up meticulously to complete the look, although she'd had to forgo her usual pink bow and that made her feel slightly nervous, her bow was a part of her. All in all though she was, for once, pleased with her appearance. 'Don't get me wrong' thought Helga Pataki wryly to herself 'I'm not the sort of person to dress up just for some guy, I'm not Olga!" But then, Arnold wasn't just some guy, and she hoped that tonight….she sighed. She didn't know what she'd hoped realistically._

_The trouble was that now she was here, she couldn't see him. It wasn't just because the Sports Hall was packed with enthusiastic high-schoolers. She was, after all, used to picking him out of a crowd. He was the person that she always searched for. The person her eyes were instinctively drawn to. The person that…well you get the picture. No. It wasn't because she was missing him, it was because he wasn't here._

_She frowned slightly. She could have sworn that Gerald had said that he and Arnold would be coming together. And Tall Hair-Boy was here, she knew that. Phoebe had run over to him as soon as he had got here, and they were now in deep conversation. Helga had hung back because she didn't want to intrude. So if that was the case then where was Arnold?_

"_Hey baby"_

_Helga turned around quickly and narrowed her eyes at the tall, broad-shouldered football player. "Whaddya want Wolfgang?"_

_He leered at her and moved to her side quickly "Well…what do you know the resident tom boy scrubs up well…you shouldn't have gone to all this effort for me Pataki."_

_She scowled at the bully "Shove off Wolfgang – I'm looking for someone" She made to move away but he caught her wrist._

"_Aw don't go yet, we were just getting better aquainted."_

_She tore herself out of his grasp "Now listen Past-For-Brains! I don't know how long it's gonna take for this to sink into your thick skull. After all you were kept back a year, so you might be having difficulty understanding me, but read my lips: I-am-not-INTERESTED!" With that she turned on her heel and was about to march off when she felt a hand slap her on the ass._

"_You know you don't mean that Pataki – after all you're lucky somebody's giving you attention. You should be grateful" She twisted around and noticed his eyes were glazed over from drink, and he was still leering down at her. She heard cat-calls coming from one of his cronies behind her. "Yeah Pataki" _

_Suddenly she felt one of them pinch her butt. Wolfgang was laughing and she took that moment to draw her arm back and then punch him square in the jaw. He looked stunned for a second before falling over and grabbing at his face_

"_You bi-"_

"_NOONE touches Helga G. Pataki – Is that understood?" The cronies fled back with fear, and with that she shoved through the crowd which had formed around her._

_Where the heck was Arnold? She needed him now – needed him to make her feel better, to make her feel like a person again…._

_Her breath hitched as she saw Phoebe and Gerald push their way towards her, both with concerned looks on their faces._

"_Oh Helga" She fell into Phoebe's open arms, shaking a little from the combination of anger, fear and disgust_

"_Where is he Pheebs?"_

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_Wolfgang was right – she was a bitch, she thought absentmindly to herself as she watched Arnold pace up and down the moonlit Sports field. Well she had finally found him, and yet she knew that at this particular moment in time he needed her – or well someone – not the other way around. She would have to be strong for him._

_Gerald had told her that something bad had happened, Arnold had received a phone call and left suddenly, and that he hadn't been able to get in touch with his best friend after that. The dance was a dud anyway, so the three of them had gone off to try phoning Arnold. All Helga could think about was how selfish she was. She'd wanted to see Arnold so he could give her support. She hadn't thought about how he was._

"_Helga…" Phoebe looked over at her friend whilst Gerald was leaving his third message on the Boarding House answerphone, and smiled reassuringly "I'm sure he'll be okay."_

"_Pheebs, I'm horrible. I wanted to find him for my own stupid needs…I didn't think about-"_

"_You weren't to know. And don't give me that Helga" she looked stern now "You know as well as I that when it comes to Arnold you put him way above yourself, You are not horrible."_

_Helga shook her head remorsefully. "That's not true…you know how AWFUL I've been to him"_

"_That was ages ago. You've been friends with him for over 5 years now Helga-"_

"_It doesn't matter how long ago it was Pheebs…the thing is I was a b-bully" she started to tear up a little now "I p-pushed him away to hide my true feelings and I didn't care if I hurt him in the p-process. And even if I have been friends with him for a while, it doesn't m-matter b-b-because I'm still lying to him!" A single tear escaped its confines and trudged its way slowly down her cheek._

_Phoebe shook her head. "Helga think of all the things you've done for him without him even knowing about it. Yes you might have concealed your true feelings, but that doesn't mean you haven't been watching over him."_

_The blonde girl ran shaking hands through her hair, loosening a twisted lock as she did so and causing it to stick to the side of her pale face. "I-I think I need some air Pheebs."_

_Her friend nodded and smiled as Helga made her way to the door, shutting it softly behind her. Ignoring the chill in the air she walked towards the sports field without really thinking and that's how she came across the boy she had loved for near enough her entire life._

_She'd approached him nervously "Hey football head is that you? We've been worried…"_

_He had been angry, and scared. She could see it in his deep green eyes, but she hadn't left his side. She'd waited patiently and let him get it all out. When he had cried about his Grandma nearly dying….she'd teared up too. She'd reassured him and comforted him as best she could. She thought she'd managed to cheer him up a little. And then….then as she looked up into those mesmerising eyes, she found that she couldn't rip her gaze away. She had tried to communicated everything she had ever felt about him without saying a word, putting every emotion into her gaze. His eyes seemed to widen. Was he understanding?_

_Instinctively she reached up to his face and brushed away a stray tear with her thumb, leaving her hand lingering there for a moment…or was it an eternity? She didn't know…_

"_Thank you" He'd mumbled hoarsely, and he broke their gaze, looking down to his feet. This brought Helga back to earth and made her realise just what she'd done. _

_Why? Why had she done it? She knew the answer: she'd wanted to show him how much she cared, she wanted to let him know that he didn't have to deal with things alone. But the problem was, he didn't feel the same way. He couldn't feel the same way, she thought bitterly to herself, she had never given him reason to. So what, she had suddenly opened up a little of her heart for him to see? So…that made no difference. It couldn't now. She had cut herself off from him at the age of 3, and she had never given him a reason to change his mind about her._

_And now? Well, they had a good friendship but nothing more…she had sat on the side lines these past five years, watching him with other girls. Watching him fall into love with others. Watching him fall out of love. Inside she had been screaming "Notice me! I'm the one! I love you – I would never hurt you!" on the outside she had just listened to his problems and reassured him and…never said anything. She was always there but she always kept her distance. But after what had just happened, he would know. He must have realised. And she…she felt life a rabbit caught in headlights. What could she do now?_

_Luckily Gerald and Phoebe had come upon them just at that moment, and after giving his best friend a hug, Gerald offered to take Arnold home. Arnold had nodded and glanced back at Helga, but she kept her eyes to the floor and just blushed furiously. With that, Arnold departed and she sank into despair._

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Helga realised that her legs had taken her on autopilot to the dock. She made her way to the pier to sit down. It was where she came to think, when she needed to be alone, or if she wanted to write a poem. Now though, it was a place of solitude to mull over what had happened between her and Arnold. Ever since that night, and ever since her actions, Arnold had been acting strange and distant. She knew she had pushed him away with her forwardness. She knew she had scared him away.

It was like the FTI incident all over again, except worse because now there was no 'heat of the moment' excuse. And even if there was would she have taken it back? She shook her head. Probably not. She wanted him to know. She wanted to let him see that he was right about her, she could care…did care.

But she didn't want it to ruin their friendship. She had come to realise some time ago that just having Arnold in her life was worth more than anything to her. So in a way she wished that she could erase her actions that night.

"Oh Arnold" she sighed as she looked out to the sun setting over the sea, casting an orange glow on all the ships anchored there. It was deserted now – just the way she liked it. "Why did I have to complicate things?" She would give up forever just to touch him, just to see him again.

She had never wanted the world to see her because, she had never thought they would understand. But now? Well the world could go to hell. This was the moment of truth in her lies and she wanted to stand up and be proud of who she was. In a way she was proud. She was an A grade student, she was going to a good college, in fact she had just got her acceptance letter through and hadn't told anyone about it yet. Everyone thought she was going to Hillwood University but she had just been accepted for Princeton majoring in Writing. Helga knew that Arnold would be attending that college too, studying Archeology…She had been glad that she would still get to see him next year but, she was also afraid. Afraid that she had wrecked everything between them for good. Her hope, she realised, was fading. She drew her knees up to her and clasped her hands around them.

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><p>Arnold stood on the dock, gazing at Helga who was perched on the end of the pier. Her silvery blonde hair was tied back with her pink bow, being used as an alice band, and its tangled waves blew gently in the wind. She was wearing a denim jacket over a pink blouse and she hugged her knees, which were clad in her trademark skinny jeans – frayed and ripped in places. He noted that she was wearing the pink converses he had gone with her to pick out last year with her birthday money.<p>

She was bathed in the orangey glow of the sunset and she looked slightly ethereal – it was like she was consumed by fire and passion and that thought made Arnold smile. She was probably the most passionate person he knew. The smartest too actually. And the most caring, although she didn't often let on…

He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He had followed her here, because he wanted to let her know how he felt. But now he was here blinking in the sunlight he wasn't so sure he could do it. He was nervous, very nervous. But he couldn't live with what ifs anymore. Slowly, very slowly, he made his way down the Pier towards her. As he got closer, he realised she was caught up with her thoughts and she looked sad, really sad. He wanted to make her feel better. Was this really the way to do it? By confusing her and laying his problems on her?

He got out his poem, the latest one he had written about her, and re-read it.

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How would she live without him? Helga didn't know. She couldn't even make it through a day without thinking about him. He was her world, her heart and her soul. He was one half of her. She didn't know what she would do – she'd be lost if she had lost him…

The wind picked up and she gave a shiver, tightening her grip on her knees, and then she saw something out of the corner of her eye. A fluttering piece of paper, tossed in the wind. Without really knowing why she leaned over and caught it, unfolding it.

Her eyes quickly scanned the lines.

_Almost_

_I almost realized I loved you,_

_Once or twice; it's hard to tell,_

_One thing I know for certain;_

_I almost wish you would've loved me too,_

_We touch and you're….afraid of me?_

_I almost burn and I'm at your feet,_

_In the dark we make a brighter light,_

_And now our journeys' almost through,_

_You should know I love you,_

_That's what's true,_

_And you almost drive me crazy with,_

_Your words, about me, you and us,_

_So I'm mad, mad about you,_

_Almost mad about love,_

_Lost in your eyes I fall,_

_Keep on falling and almost land,_

_Yet what I want, it's out,_

_Out of reach,_

_Almost out of grasp_

_And I almost said I loved you,_

_Once or twice; it's hard to tell,_

_One thing I know for certain;_

_I almost wish you would've loved me too_

_Arnold Shortman_

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Her head jolted up and she saw him standing there behind her.

"Arnold, wha-"

He moved forwards until he was standing next to her and he held out a hand to help her to her feet like he had done a million times before, his cheeks burning furiously. "Well you always use poems to express yourself, even though you won't ever let me see them" he gave her a little smile "so I thought I would give it a try."

"Oh." She took his hand and stood up, gazing into his eyes. "But – what are you doing here?"

He looked into her deep blue eyes, so mysterious and captivating that he could just stay looking at her forever.

"I came to find you. Look Helga…" He realised he was still holding her hand and he tore his eyes away from his gaze to their interlocked fingers. Helga noticed to and made a move as if to pull her hand away, but he just tightened his grip. "….Helga, that poem….it was about you."

She didn't know what to think. Her world was spinning. She was going to fall. Arnold seemed to notice this because with his free hand he gripped her waist. "Helga?"

"I-I….I thought you were avoiding me." She stuttered looking away.

His brow furrowed. "Why on earth would I ever do that." He let go of her hand and tilted her face so they were once again looking at each other.

"She blinked as tears swam unbidden into her eyes. "I thought you had realised how much I like-" she swallowed "….LOVE you. I thought that-"

Arnold's eyes widened. "Helga I would never be able to avoid you, even if I wanted to, even if I didn't think you felt the same because" He smiled down at her "because I love you too. I didn't realise it until the night of the Spring Dance but I think…no I know that I have always loved you."

Helga gasped. "Bu-but you can't!" She didn't know why she said that but she knew that at this point in time she was hardly thinking rationally.

He raised an eyebrow. "Why? Because you're the smartest girl I know? The most passionate? The most caring? Or because you do the craziest and most wonderful things for reasons I'll never understand-"

"-It…It's all been because of you….e-everything I've done it's been for y-"

Arnold crashed his lips down on hers and noted that they tasted of strawberry chapstick. He ran his fingers through the soft waves of her hair, his heart pounding like it was about to burst right out of his ribcage. Suddenly she brought her arms up around his neck and pulled him further down to her, and pressed her body up against his.

His stomach flipped over and he nearly drowned in their kiss before finally pulling away and resting his forehead against hers, breathing in great gulps of air. He noticed that her eyes were still closed and she was grinning. He smiled and pecked her once more on the lips.

"Helga, I know I've been dense. I know it's taken me a stupidly long time but – I do love you."

She sighed happily and opened her big blue eyes, running her fingers through the unruly hair at the nape of his neck. "I don't care Arnold, I really don't care. I never thought that I would be so lucky for you to-"

"Shh Helga." He put a finger against her soft lips and studied her face intensely. "I'm the lucky one. I thought that I would be too late…I thought"

She shook her head. "Never. You would never have been too late." She kissed him on the cheek and then wrapped him into a hug as they watched the sun completely set.

He rested his head on top of hers and something caught his eye. He grinned a gave the girl in his arms a slight shake.

"Hey Helga…"

"Yes Arnold?"

"I like your bow"

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A/N: Squeeeee so I hoped you liked this story - I LOVE happy endings and I thought that Arnold and Helga both needed one, especially considering how much they were beating themselves up about the situation :D

So if you like (and even if you didn't) please R+R - I love comments because not only do they make me feel all happy inside, but they also make me a better writer, so really there's no excuse not to leave one :P

Thanks to everyone who's read this, and hopefully I'll be updating soon

Love Arabella-Minette xx


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